We Don't Have a Low-Self-Esteem Issue, We Have an Envy Issue
Updated: May 17, 2020
I know you have probably never felt this way, but I have. That awful feeling, that pit of your stomach sadness. Its at the worst time too: right as you're trying to sleep. You go on social media, and see that friend of yours. Oh man do you really dislike that friend of yours. They are always sooooo good. They are so talented, so pretty, so much more an over-achiever than YOU. Why did their post of landing a huge achievement have to pass your scrolling at 12 am? They achieved the thing that you bust your hump for everyday, and you have nothing to show for all the work YOU put in. Man, doesn't that hurt? It's sometimes worse than hurt. Its ADVANCED hurt. Maybe you're lucky and have never experienced it, but I have. I get sad, I beat myself up, I chalk it up to they have luck, and I wasn't dealt the winning hand. But are these feelings valid? Why, after seeing someone else do something great, do we cave in on ourselves? Its one word. ENVY. The worst four letter word out there next to a couple honorable mentions.
Fr. Mike Schmitz of Duluth MN eloquently says, "Envy is the one sin that NEVER makes us feel good." He is spot on. When we experience envy we never feel good. You will never feel good comparing your tiny self to the world around you, or your neighbor. Why is his grass greener on his side of the fence? I have an envy issue, you have an envy issue, we ALL have an envy issue. We wish we were that other person. The hardest truth to realize is: YOU are YOU. WHOA PHILOSOPHICAL. You are you because you were never meant to be the person you envy. They have purpose, and your purpose is separate from theirs! The thing is, low self-esteem is a byproduct of envy. You wish you were _____, You're not _____, therefore you bring it on yourself. At the end of the day, our low self esteem comes from our envy. With social media nowadays, we see the "best" of everyone, which makes it so easy to fall into a pit of envy.
I wish I never felt envious, but it can be the nature of the artist. When we cave, we lose interest, we put it off till tomorrow, we sleep it off, we throw on any TV show just to get away from what we're SUPPOSED to be doing. I got a cure for envy. Three step plan: Recognize, Work, Achieve. Recognize when you're envious. When you have that moment of wishing you were that other person, stop, do what you do to get away from it (turn off the phone, block the app, etc.), and try to get in a better head-space. Second, get to work. Do the one thing you were made to do. Whatever it might be, DO IT. Get rid of the attitude of low self esteem, and DO IT. Don't put it off another second. The more you dwell in envy, the less of your dream you achieve. The things we want most take work, HARD WORK. Turn this envy into fire to get you moving. Lastly, Achieve. Look back at what you've accomplished once you're done for the day. Be happy with your work. Know that you took the right step to moving towards your dream. If you can fall asleep at night knowing you're taking the necessary steps in the right direction, then you're progressing towards your goal. This simple 3 step remedy will cure your envy. Simple can be an understatement...It is HARD to do this process. Envy is an uphill battle, but being aware of it is half that battle. You were destined for great things, otherwise you wouldn't be here! You were destined to be YOU, not your neighbor, friend, coworker, favorite drummer out there. YOU ARE YOU, and YOU ARE THE ONLY YOU that will EVER EXIST (Sorry for my use of capitals). Get to work, and don't let that pesky four letter word slow you down.
"A tranquil heart is life of the flesh, but envy is the rottenness of the bones"